Andrushka

I keep imagining the many ways in which Serhiy will die over the next three days. These are not the usual visions of his evisceration that dance in my head when I see yellowing mayonnaise left out on the counter or peanut butter spread on the computer keyboard. These are heartfelt nightmares regarding his trip from Lincoln to Ukraine. This morning he left on Amtrak's California Zephyr for Chicago. It was over two and a half hours late, which deeply frustrated my sleeping schedule (read that metonymically). If it was this late in getting here, how late will it be arriving in Chicago? Serhiy will have to change trains in Chicago and currently has a three hour lay over. But if this one is late and that one is on time, I can envision him lost and homeless in the Windy City. At least there I know people close enough to go get him. Assuming he makes his connection, he'll be in New York tomorrow (Tuesday) around 3:00 p.m. and meet Seth at Penn Station around 3:20. Now here's a part of this trip planning that makes me wonder if it wasn't meant to weed out the poor planners from the gene pool: they have to stay overnight in NYC, but didn't have any arrangements made for shelter. I found this out yesterday when Serhiy was talking about finding ways to bathe in the city. I asked how long he was going to be there and when he replied, "overnight," I said he should bathe wherever they had arranged to stay. It seems their plans up to that point were to either sleep in the airport (where they couldn't check in to get to the comfortable sections until the next morning) or a park. In New York City. So, last night we reserved a room for two at a hostel in the West End, one block off Broadway. It's about two blocks from a subway station that connects to Penn Station, but they'll still have to haul their luggage (in Serhiy's case, two gigantic suitcases and a backpack) through the subway system and then down the street. Growing up in the Midwest, I have certain prejudices regarding the dangers of New York, especially for fish so obviously out of water. Scenes pass through my mind of the NRA-card-wielding South Carolinian and the Uke of Hazard getting mugged on their two block walk through posh Manhattan. Who knows what carousing/sight-seeing they'll do in the afternoon, but I'm sure it will involve unsafe activities. This is, after all, a boy who manages to make mayonnaise a hazardous material. The next morning, they'll have to find their way to the airport, and Serhiy doesn't know which one it is. Hopefully Seth knows. I told Serhiy to just take a cab, but I can imagine they'll try to find a cheaper method that involves lugging large suitcases through public transportation that goes through Brooklyn and Queens. Once at the airport, I see them being unable to understand the thick accent of the TSA agent and being held for questioning, Seth will be given an ultimatum by the judge and end up joining the army, Serhiy will be one of the uncounted, nameless inmates in Gitmo. If he makes it through Chicago, NYC, his transfer in London, and all the way to Kyiv, I still don't think he's out of danger, but at least he'll have friends meeting him at the airport to mitigate the odds of having everything stolen as they make their way by bus then subway to the train station. The real problem will come when he decides he needs to use his Visa card somewhere and a Ukrainian bank will steal all his money and leave him with overdraft fees. Unlike other people who I know that this has happened to, he won't have an embassy to complain to and won't get legal services for free. But at least once he's at home in Kazatin he'll have his real mother to worry about him and it won't be my problem anymore. Of course, this is all just in my imagination. What will probably happen is that, if anything goes wrong anywhere along the way, he'll be approached by some nice stranger who wants to help and probably get a ride, for free, all the way from Chicago to NYC without ever learning their name. They’ll even stick around to drive him to their airport. That's just how things work in Serhiy's world. UPDATE: I was right about the train being late. He got to Chicago 8 hours late and, since he'd missed his connection, Amtrak refunded his ticket and he got a flight to NYC and arrived several hours earlier than he expected. He checked into the hostel, walked around town, and met up with Seth whose train was more than 3 hours late. So, as always, things turned out better than expected through sheer luck.

Posted by Scott on 15 May 2006 at 5/15/2006 11:23:00 AM | Permalink